This Is Why You Crave Drama

Do you miss them…
or do you miss how unstable they made you feel?

Because those are two very different things.

You don’t miss the disrespect.
You don’t miss the anxiety.
You don’t miss crying at 2 a.m.

So why does calm feel so empty right now?
Why does peace make you restless instead of relieved?

Here’s the truth most people avoid:

You’re not broken.
You’re addicted to chaos.

And before you get defensive, ask yourself:

👉 When things are quiet, do you start overthinking?
👉 When someone is consistent, do you lose interest?
👉 When life feels stable, do you feel strangely numb?

Exactly.

Let’s call it what it is

If love in your past was unpredictable…
If attention came and went…
If affection had to be earned…

Your nervous system learned a rule it still follows today:

Chaos = connection
Peace = danger

So tell me:

When was the last time you chose someone calm and didn’t try to sabotage it?
When was the last time you let something good stay good?

How the addiction shows up

Read this slowly:

• You crave intensity, not intimacy

• You confuse anxiety with attraction

• You romanticize people who emotionally starve you

• You feel more alive in emotional pain than emotional safety

Now pause.

Which one hurt because it’s true?

And be real
how many times have you called this “passion” instead of what it really is?

A real moment (no soft storytelling)

There was a time when everything in my life finally calmed down.
No drama.
No emotional chaos.
No constant overthinking.

And instead of peace?

I felt uncomfortable.

So uncomfortable that my mind started searching for problems that didn’t exist.
Missing people who treated me badly.
Replaying situations that were already resolved.

Let me ask you something uncomfortable:

If chaos disappeared from your life tomorrow…
who would you be without it?

Here’s the brutal truth

Chaos isn’t chemistry.
Anxiety isn’t attraction.
Intensity isn’t depth.

So why do we keep chasing it?

Because calm doesn’t spike adrenaline.
It doesn’t keep you alert.
It doesn’t make you feel like you’re fighting for love.

But ask yourself:

Do you want butterflies or do you want peace?
Do you want obsession or do you want safety?
Do you want to feel alive or do you want to feel secure?

You can’t have both at the same time.

Breaking the addiction (this is where growth happens)

This isn’t about “choosing better.”
It’s about rewiring your body.

Ask yourself these as you read:

1. Are you bored or just unfamiliar with peace?

Not everything needs to feel intense to be meaningful.

2. Do you want love or do you want distraction?

Because chaos is a great distraction from yourself.

3. Are you creating intensity in your own life?

Or are you outsourcing it to relationships?

4. Are you willing to feel uncomfortable without running back?

Because healing feels boring before it feels safe.

Sit with that.

What choosing peace actually looks like

It looks like:

• Calm conversations instead of emotional explosions

• Consistency instead of mind games

• Silence without panic

• Love without proving your worth

Now ask yourself:

Why does that scare you?

🎧 Song of the week:

• Hemi Moore – Poison Ivy
  For when you realize you weren’t in love, you were addicted to what was slowly killing you.

Final questions (don’t skip these)

Before you close this email, ask yourself:

• Am I addicted to love or addicted to emotional chaos?

• Would I recognize peace if it showed up in my life?

• Who am I without the drama I keep romanticizing?

You don’t need more intensity.
You need regulation.

And once your nervous system catches up?

Peace won’t feel boring anymore.
It’ll feel powerful.

Felipa XOXO💌